Dreaming of You

This was the first piece I posted, over a year ago, back when I was at the very beginning of this journey and trying to find my voice and figure out just what I wanted to do with this little space of the WordPress World.

At the moment I’m filled with things I NEED to be writing about, but the words won’t come. For many reasons- grief, exhaustion, uncertainty among them.

Looking back over the things I’ve shared this past 12 months, this, the first post, deals with the same thing I’m attempting to get a handle on now.

Loss.

While I try to do a little bit of ‘practicing that which I have a tendency to preach’ and gathering of emotional reserves, I’m also trying to remind myself that our stories continue to draw us together- even when we are faced with the very foundations of our lives being torn apart.  We can, sometimes, find the peace we need to keep on moving forward in our past reflections.  Hoping that this will be the case for me right now.

colemining

Today I had occasion to stop and think about the way people move in and out of one’s life.  It came up over coffee with a friend.  She was remembering the loss of one her childhood companions, gone 20 years today, killed in a random skiing accident.  Her first thought when I pressed her to talk about him was that he died doing what he loved best and that fact used to give her some measure of comfort, since it defined the person he was.  She went on to talk about how, not unlike the death of pivotal politicians or celebrities, she remembered exactly what she was doing when the call came, and precisely how she sprang into action to ensure that she could get home to say goodbye to him, despite the fact that she now realizes she was in shock.  At 22 she had felt loss before, but…

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9 comments on “Dreaming of You

  1. Sending you love and all things positive as you deal with your loss. Know you will find your peace, in some form, when you least expect it.

  2. bethbyrnes says:

    My deepest sympathies, Cole. I read your March 29 2013 post too. I personally experienced the loss of someone with whom I was very close. I immediately had a religious revival of my faith that there is a higher being. For one thing, this person had been larger than life, a superb human being, had done a great deal for me and everyone they met. I could not believe that it was all gone and for nothing, in an instant. Toward the end, they had a vision that it was not I they were talking to but a relative that had died forty years earlier, as if they were meeting that person on the way to the afterlife, as has been reported so often. In any event, I was in shock for a year afterward, but hadn’t recognized it until after it was largely past. I am a Jungian psychology subscriber, so I do tend toward the archetypes and I have my own theory of dreams. In any case, I have had personal experience with this and empathise completely. Take it easy and know that you are supported here.

    • colemining says:

      Thank you Beth. As always, your words are welcome and reassuring. Trying to sort out all the feelings and lessons of the past while so that they might be articulated and, ultimately, shared. xoxo

  3. A timely post, for me anyway.Thanks for so eloquently putting these feelings into words….I just don’t seem able to at the moment.

  4. […] gotta know that I don’t believe in heaven.  But, as I wrote in the post I reblogged yesterday, the idea of heaven, as a metaphor, or archetype, drawn from our […]

  5. ksbeth says:

    what a beautiful gift he gave to you. i’m so sorry for your loss. beth

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